Like a kid

If there's one thing I hear from a lot of people it's that they wish they could be a kid again. Everyone misses their child hood in some way shape or form, they miss the lightheartedness of it, the lack of worry, stress, and heaviness of the responsibility that adulthood brings. Everything is just so simple when you're a kid. Life is imagination, make believe, cartoons, running around, playing princess/cops and robbers, getting dirty and not caring, climbing trees, the list could go on....you can be anything, do anything, pretend everything. The world is HUGE and amazing and new. The possibilities are literally endless. You could change your mind everyday on the subject of "what you want to be when you grow up". A fire fighter? A princess? A pilot? Maybe a mom or a dad? The president of the united states? SURE! And at that age NO ONE can stop you. You have your whole life ahead of you.


Kids are amazing, and if you take the time to watch them, you'll realize how much you really have to learn from a kid. You might be reading this and thinking to yourself, "What could I possibly learn from a kid? I've been there, I've lived my life." Truth is there is SO much. I feel like as adults we loose the ability to be excited over the frivolous things, or to look at something in complete and utter wonder, to make decisions based solely on what WE want, to live completely in the moment...we loose the ability to be FREE. I know, I know....Life is stressful. There are bills to pay, jobs to work, deadlines to meet, people to please... you know, big important "adult things" to do. But whens the last time you got legitimately HAPPY over candy? Or rolled down a grass hill and didn't give a rats rear about grass stains? Or actually kind of wanted to admit that you wish you could believe in Santa again....or maybe even admit that there's a little piece of your heart that still does.....


Try seeing things from the eyes of a child....get excited....maybe let out a little squeal over ice cream...jump up and down when your excited....slide down a slide....climb a tree....walk up to someone and ask them to be your friend, you might get shut down because society teaches you to watch out for people, but shooooot who cares! If you have a child, make believe with them....the black squares are lava and the white ones are safe! I know you know what I'm talking about....it's really amazing how much of a kid you STILL are, and how much you work to repress it. God forbid you NOT be what you're expected to be at the age you're expected to be it. I have a secret for you....it doesn't matter. When it all comes down to it, your job, your money, your car, your bills, NONE of it REALLY matters. I'm not by any means telling you to quit your job, stop paying your bills, drive your car off a cliff or throw away your money, but what I am telling you to do is treat it like a kid. Stop worrying and putting more lines on your face, stop obsessing over making that phone call, writing that email, impressing that boss, making that meeting, and start getting excited over life. 


It's funny how we spend our whole lives trying to and being told to GROW UP.... it's all you can do to just GET BIGGER. Puberty hits and If your a guy you want muscles and facial hair...for a girl you want boobs and curves. You want to be an adult, treated like and adult, to do adult things. You get to middle school, then high school, and at that point all you can think about its being 16 so you can drive, then being 18 so you can buy porn or cigarettes and vote. Then it's all about being 21 so you can drink, party and go to clubs. Then it's college and getting that perfect job, so you can make perfect money and be perfectly stressed out about doing more perfectly adult things. And then....you wish you could have a time machine to go back and do it all over again. 


Unfortunately that's not possible, BUT, You can still take the time to run, play, tickle, laugh uncontrollably over a fart or a burp, put holes in your jeans, lick ice cream so slowly that it melts, pour an entire bag of pop rocks in your mouth and giggle while they tickle your tongue, poke the brown sugar at the store, stick a quarter in a gumball machine, ride a bike with out hands, play tag/hide and seek/heads up 7 up, run through the sprinklers, play super Nintendo til your fingers go numb...and this is just to name a few. And the next time you meet a kid, remember to act like him or her a little bit. Let your inner kiddo out. Life is to short not to.

Do what inspires you and be happy.

If there's one thing I'm not short on it's ways to be inspired. Those moments when I see or hear something, or meet someone that gives me that heart pounding, idea creating, smile inducing, want to shout from the roof tops moment. A lot of the time I feel as though I live off of these moments. You know the ones... when you see that something somewhere and you're like "Holy Crap, it all makes sense!" The moments where something clicks in your head and you just HAVE to do something with your new found inspiration, And If you don't have inspiration, it's a must do to to find it. For me, it could be anything from a song, a quote, a smile from a stranger, God, my son, a beautiful ocean scene or a sunset, the list could go on.  


Find your happy thought(s) and think them daily. Keep adding to your "happy thought repertoire" everyday. Meditate on them, live them and believe them. You owe it to yourself to feel nothing but stunning everyday. After a while with all these happy thoughts and inspirational moments, the negativity in your life begins to disappear. Positive thoughts are just so wonderfully, deliciously huge and powerful that they beat negative thoughts up like Chuck Norris would beat a bad guy (and we all know how much of a bad a** Chuck Norris is) But you really have to focus on it. Wake up EVERY morning being thankful you have a new day to live, and that right there folks should be your very first inspiring happy thought for the day! After that it's really up to you to be aware of the thoughts you're thinking and stop those negative thoughts dead in their tracks and send 'em packin'. Those inspiration killers have no place to be setting up camp on your dome.


Next step is to act upon your inspirations. Say for example you meet someone who's amazingly in shape, you see them happy, healthy and lookin' good. You're inspired suddenly to go to the gym. DO IT. Don't let your inspiration slip through your fingers. (this was a poor example, but your get the idea) It could be anything, but the one thing that's EVERYTHING is acting upon your inspiration. It's a GIFT, not a coincidence. There are NO coincidences. God puts these moments directly into your path, wrapped up in glittery paper and bows, perfectly catered to you and your soul. Soon, you'll start to realize how inspiration leads you to your happy place. And keeps you there.


 I started to realize quickly how inspirational could be to to people, and how through being legitimately happy every minute I possible can, rubs off on every person I come across, whether they like it or not. I get asked "WHY are you so happy!? It's a new guy isn't it!?" (ha! I wish. But even still there's no person but myself that can give me the happiness I want) No. "I just AM. I CHOSE IT. Every day." Is my usual response. And thus, the seed is planted. They want in on the happiness, and good thing there's plenty to go around. (Infinite amounts to be specific)  People who know me, know that "bad days" are few and far between, and if my entire day is going badly, my "choice-o-meter" is broken. Because it's absolutely a choice to have a bad day. I know it's a hard thing to swallow, but I speak the truth. You have a choice as to how you react to the happenings in your day, and how your react will have an effect on how your day continues. 


One way I started to continue inspiring myself and help me create amazing days for myself was inspiring though trying to help others be inspired. I started an "inspiration board" at work. Just a small coffee cup shaped black board that I write little messages on for my customers to read. There's a new one, carefully and lovingly picked each and every week. After a while I had people taking pictures of them, asking who put them there, telling me they were going text/email it to a loved one, or hollering to their friend "Hey come check this out!". My regulars  all know where to look for their weekly inspiration and they look forward to it. Such a simple concept, and so amazingly effective for both sides.  Who knows how many hearts have been inspired for people who might have walked into the store in a slump or a bad mood... maybe feeling brokenhearted or hopeless...read my sign, felt like it was meant for them and then in turn left in a different and inspired mood. Then, they go and spread their happiness with just ONE person, and that person goes and shares it with another, so on and so forth. 


It's a domino effect that makes my heart explode with joy... literally has the tendency to almost bring me to tears sometimes.... And that my friends is what inspiration is made of.

The Kickboxing Class

I did a kick boxing class. Whoopdeedoo right? The thing is that I wasn't expecting to do it. I happen to know someone who works at L.A. Boxing. A week ago (more like a month at this point) I went to say "Hi" and check the place out. You know, just be an innocent bystander. Watch and not actually DO. I went in my gym clothes with the intention of leaving there and going to my gym to do the usual work out. I was not expecting my friend to hand me a pair of boxing gloves and show me to a 150 pound punching bag.

Me: I'm not doing this.

Him:  Yes you are.

Me: No, seriously. (Trying to muster up a brilliant excuse) My friend is meeting me at my gym soon! (now I've got him! muahaha)

Him: Oh......well call your friend and tell her you can't make it! You're doing this.

Me: (desperate now) But I'm not in shape enough for this! Do I look in shape enough for this?? (No. no no no no no....I'm not ready!)

Him: Yup you do. (pointing at a girl who was very over weight and there for her first time) Do you think SHE'S in shape enough for this, it's her first time and she's doing it.

I had no rebuttal...he'd beat me at my procrastination game. I'd given in. Practically pushed into getting my butt voluntarily whooped. He then let me in on the fact that the instructor that was going to be teaching my class was notorious for being the toughest. That's just SUPER. In my head I was freaking out. I was sure to meet my doom. He wrapped my hands, introduced me to the devil spawn instructor, told me if I started to feel light headed or anything to stop, get some water and jump back in. Light headed??????  Should I be signing a waiver or something?

Right off the bat we were jogging/sprinting, doing push ups, lunges, jump squats....you know, the devil spawn stuff...That was the warm up. I was more like tore up. Turns out they have shirts that read "Your work out is our warm up". I can vouch for that!  To my dismay the class did get harder and more intense. I rather clumsily "two left feeted" my way through and slowly learned the proper way to right hook, knee, upper cut, kick and jab my punching bag into submission, all while music blasted me through the work out. 

At some points I honest to god thought that I was going to die...or puke. I had to stop a couple times for a minute or two to catch my breath...which didn't even seem like it was mine anymore. Every once in a while I'd hear "Craig" the devil spawn instructor yell "Do you hate me yet?! Too slow. Start over! Sprint! Jog! Jump squat!" He finished the trip to hell with a wall squat, that made my legs shake, but I'll be damned I finished it and I wasn't dead, nor did I puke. I DID IT. Not with flying colors, but I finished it down to the last second.

Now the REAL significance of this is that I conquered my fears....Of being laughed at, looking stupid, looking fat/awkward/falling on my face....the list could go on....it was so much more than a question of being "not in shape enough". I came out feeling more confident, more in shape than I thought I was but also learned what I need to work on as well as feeling stronger for pushing through the pain and getting through the class semi unscathed.* I actually THANKED the instructor.

This experience made me think about how many times I've let the fear of failing, being rejected, looking stupid Etc. etc. deter  me from doing what I really wanted. From tackling life's 150 pound punching bags. It's natural to have fear...as a matter or fact you should have some amount of fear in some situations...but in others it's all about how you handle it. How you overcome it, and rock the socks off of what ever situation it may be. Sometimes you have to just keeping pushing and pushing yourself through until you get to your goal...or as Michael Jackson was say "Don't stop til you get enough"!









*The semi unscathed part does not include the almost week after the class that I literally was crippled with soreness....even the bottoms of my feet. Yup. Apparently you have muscles in the bottom of your feet, that need some toning.

** And you know I look like a bad mutha trucka with my Lightening Mc Queen and Mater tatoos in that picture....oh yeah, I'm tough!

For one more day

Have you ever thought about people passed and if they're still with you? Still around making sure you're ok...that they could be in that cold chill, the goosebumps on the back of your neck, maybe a smell that couldn't possibly come from anywhere in your house, a breeze through your hair when they're crossing your mind or even that time when you see someone on the street, and for a split second their smile matches your loved one's and you could have SWORN it was them.

I believe that there are a lot of people "with" me. Each person impacted me in some way, some may not have even known they impacted me at all or how much. They are in my dreams, sometimes the sparkle in a stranger's eye, or like I said, in a sudden gust of a warm breeze over my neck, seemingly whispering to me.  Always when their smiles or a memory pass through my mind.

Recently it's been a lot more frequent, having an out of the blue thought of my Uncle Mike who passed when I was a young girl, the smile that matches my mom's and my own burned into my memory. Visions of my papa sitting at his spot at the head of the table, or standing over his famous spaghetti sauce. My Grampa Jones in his lazy boy, faded navy tattoos, his lap just begging to be jumped on for a cuddle. My friend Nick Zambeck, making me laugh, helping me through hard times he didn't even know I was going through. These memories I've been having so often, sometimes bring tears to my eyes, and make my heart ache in missing them and their precious hearts so much, but mostly I smile in remembrance, and take comfort in the fact that I know I'm being "hugged" when I feel like I'm alone, that my hand is being held through tough times,  in knowing I'm making my Grandpa, Uncle and Friend proud  and that in the moments they're crossing my mind, they're right there with me.

It's so important to cherish these memories, and to keep their memories alive. Each of these people, are one's who in whatever way molded me to be part of who I am today, they taught me something, or many things, were part of my life, my dreams, my heart and soul. 

Part of my inspiration to write this post, came from the book 'For One More Day' by Mitch Albom, the book is somewhat  based on the same idea that your loved ones visit you when you're thinking of them. The man in the book, gets one more day with his mother who passed without his getting to say good bye, and gets to tell her the things he wished he could have. There are so so many times I've wondered what it would be like to have a passed loved one for one more day, for one more hug, for one more laugh, for one more I love you. 

Life is so precious, and so short, and so very fragile... make sure you're loving the people in your life, and letting them KNOW you love them as much as possible.You never know when you might be wishing for one more day!

Encouragement

  I have days where everything is just too much, when every bill isn't paid, money is short and stress is high Shooting through the roof, and I'm crying first thing in the morning, because sleep is the temporary magic eraser of all troubles. You're either going to wake up feeling better, Having "slept on it", or you wake up in a panic because the first things on your sleep clouded mind are the said troubles. The second scenario best describes me this morning. I had no coffee. I slept too much. Yes, TOO much...11 hours... and woke up groggy... (and pretty much stayed that way) Cried before putting my makeup on... I  allowed my self a few minutes...gave myself a pep talk...sucked it up and adjusted my tude (or I tried, It was not fully effective until I drank a large Chocolate Macadamia Nut coffee with a double shot of espresso, a splash of vanilla creamer a splash of not fat and 4 splendas......yup. Coffee snob. At least I make it myself!) And I worked. But I don't know who I was trying to fool, but I was still a wee smidgen grumpy, a little impatient...possibly snappy...but just a little....

I don't like being a in a bad mood... I try to adjust my attitude every day, and put a smile on my face, I can't control what happens through out the day, but I can control my attitude towards the situations that come my way. It's a new trick I learned, and it's made my life much easier all around. And by being positive, I rub off on other people. By smiling at people, and being genuinely happy to talk to them, you spread the positivity to them. It sounds cheesy, but tell you me it works. I don't know about you, but I want someone to make my day with a smile, or some fun small talk, or maybe even a HUG... lord knows I love hugs from anyone, I'll even hug someone I've just met! (hugs are good. Hugs heal, and make you feel warm!) Some times a big smile and a big "Have a GREAT day!!" is all the encouragement someone may need... This day was one of the days, I was needing encouragement and an extra smile... life was too much for a little while and I needed to be reeled back in. Perspective came in a surprising form.

I had a group of customers, two women, and a younger man, who was wearing some kind of heavy brace around his lower back, and had to walk holding a "walker". He seemed like he had been in an accident of some kind, so young and so dehabilitated, I respected him for what he was going through. One of the women with his was his Grandmother, she had come back in and I stopped her and for what ever reason I asked how he had injured himself. His name was Steven and he has severe arthritis in his back and just had major surgery to help. She mentioned something about concrete being put in his spine, and screws... and  It had been 4 weeks since his surgery and he still needed a walker. He was only 32!!  He had a great attitude, and you could tell he was just trying so hard to get better, you could see the drive. I felt so compelled to just go tell him he was doing great, and to not give up. His grandmother also told me he had been very active at one point... I knew deep down that he had to be frustrated. So out I went, I started by telling him how nosey I was, and that I had asked about him... and that I wanted to encourage him. He seemed shocked at first, I'm thinking not many people walk up to him and say "I want to encourage you". But that's why it can be powerful. He'll remember that moment, or I really hope he will.

The thing is, by encouraging Steven , I was encouraged. Does that make sense? By seeing what he has to go through on a daily basis just to walk, humbled me. Things could always be worse! The going gets tough and it's sometimes easy to say "I'll never be able to do ___", "I can't do ___", "How will I ever get through___" Fill in the blanks. Occasionally it can be hard to see things clearly when you're not seeing things clearly. (yes I really said that) I can't imagine losing my mobility, for any amount of time. I should be looking at the things I HAVE not the things I don't. There has to be a positive in the situation...I might not see it now, but I will learn something from this hard time. Steven has to try 2 gazillion x harder every day to live his life and not let his situation consume him. If he can do it, then I can do it.  Steven was an inspiration to me, and even in the worst days you can find something good if you just reach out and try! A special person once told me "Pain is inevitable, but misery is optional". You can choose to wallow in your issues and let your problems consume you and be MISERABLE, or you can pop a smile on that face and be happy for another day!

What does life expect of me?

It's been a while... 2 weeks actually. I had intended to write this blog post a while ago... but due to lack of inspiration, or fervor for writing, it took the back seat til' now. We had a guest speaker at church a couple Sundays ago that really impacted me. His name was Hyatt Moore, who as well as being an awesome speaker is an amazing artist. (check him out!) This man honestly had me captivated, and I'd LOVE to pick his brain. I really enjoy being inspired, and having someone challenge my ever thinking brain with something I have never mulled over before. And that is precisely what he did...with one question. What does life expect of ME? I've never thought of it that way. I mean, I know I've spent so much time thinking about what I expect from life. I might even expect TOO much from life.

By definition the word "expect" means "To look forward to the probable occurrence or appearance of ___" (fill in the blank) Personally, I've done nothing but expect things from life and I've noticed unfortunately, that with some expectations come disappointment. I expect things to go a certain way and they don't, I expect things from people and I don't get them. I expect expect expect. But the thing is, why expect when you don't really have control over alot of the events that happen in your life? Where do expectations come from? Who sets the bar for these expectations?

But when you turn the question around, it's a whole new ball game. What does the life I've been given expect of ME? It's honestly a tough question. Think about it. If "life" were a person, and was able to express how they thought you should be or do, what would life want?  I've thought a great deal about this, and actually wrote down a few things while I was listening to mister Hyatt speak, and then continued my list which I'll be sharing!

• Be a good, no scratch that, GREAT, understanding, supportive, and loving mother to my son
• Actively be a friend to everyone. Offer a smile and an open heart when needed or when not.
• To LOVE. People, myself, and LIFE.
• To DO something proactive to make a difference in mine and others' lives
• Be a good employee
• Always treat knowledge as a gift.... Its free after all!
• Be a caring daughter/sister/grand-daughter/niece
• Spread smiles to people when they don't have one
• Try to always be a person of integrity
• Laugh!
• Be thankful for every single gift I am given (not only in the material form)
• Constantly have a relationship with god

 Now it's YOUR turn. I'd love to hear what you came up with!

Undateable

 I was reading the June issue of 'Red Book' while on the bike at the gym, As I flipped to page 170, in the "Down time" Section, I spotted "From the Ha! Files" which showed a book called 'Undateable'-- It's the 311 things guys do to guarantee they won't be dating or having sex...By Ellen Rakieten and Anne Coyle. They give 4 examples from the book of things guys do (which I'll tell you in a bit) And I honestly almost fell off the bike laughing; Because they're SO true. I think the 40 something fellow gym rat next to me thought I was crazy, 'cause he was looking at me like I had just ripped one or something...anyhoo... I was inspired to do my own, shorter list, of things that personally, make a guy Undateable". If you're one of my few male readers I hope you won't take this too seriously if you so happen to fall under one of the items on my list.  The first four with the stars next to them are the one's my magazine gave.

*1. No "Jorts." The jort is a cross between a pair of jeans and a pair of shorts. They come in a wide variety of styles and lengths, all of which are hideous in any circumstance.

*2. No Fanny packs. There is never an excuse for a fanny pack

*3. No "mandles" with socks. That would be a man sandal worn with socks. You jump to maximum penalty status if you're caught wearing mandles with black socks.

*4. No pleated front pants/shorts. There is no way extra fabric gathered about the waist is helping your cause.

5. No bad hygiene. This includes but is not limited to, B.O, dirty teeth/fingernails/toes/nether regions. Or in other words, brush yo breff and try to make sure you're so fresh and so clean clean. Deodarant works wonders.

6. No being a Dungeons & Dragons/World of War Craft addict. The playing doesn't bother me, it's the rotting on one spot, "building your empire" for 3 days, that does. Refer to #5 for help with this one.

7. No poorly maintained facial hair. Love all different types of face fuzz if worn properly. However, I do not appreciate a forest on your face and being able to smell your last meal on your upper lip... please also refer to #5.

8. No Too-short shorts. Meaning to your knee caps, and just about mid calf only. Please refrain otherwise--even  more so if you have a man short tan (butt white starting mid thigh) cover that up, with shorts that fit properly of course.

9. No sporting monster nose/ear fuzz.  If it can be seen sticking out, please take care of it. No one like a nose Caterpillar.

10. No being "prettier" than me. Frosted tips/MANicures/facials etc. Men should take care of themselves, but there's a line, and frosted tips crosses it. Be at lease a little rugged.

11. No being a sloppy mess. Take at least a little pride in your appearance. A green shirt with holes, too short man shorts, and "mandals" with socks is tore up from the floor up.

12. No "braggy Bobin" it. It does not impress anyone how many reps you did at the gym, or how many inches your truck is lifted, what speakers you have, how many chicks you get, how much money you make, how many beers you drank Etc. Etc. So on and Soooo forth. When will you learn that NONE of that really matters?!

13. No drinking more than you can handle and acting like an idiot afterward.  We all know this happens to everyone sooner or later, but you learn from it, not do it over and over. I do not want to be with someone I have to drag home from the bar smelling like spilled beer and puke.

14. No treating people badly. An impolite man is most definitely someone I don't want to have relations with. I'm not talking "Woke up on the wrong side of the bed, and I'm grumpy rudeness". I'm talking USE your please and thank you's, open doors for people (men AND women of course), let that person waiting in while you're on the road if you can, be a good tipper when deserved and be polite to the server. Just general ettiquite is all I ask for. You loose extra brownie points if you're caught chewing with your mouth open.

15. No disrespecting your mama. She busted her ass raising you-- gotta show respect. (certain situations may make this one void) I'm not talking be a mama's boy and have her do laundry for you still, but be close and treat her right.

I don't want to go toooo crazy with this...just for fun... I also do not take credit for the "Undateable" idea...this was just my personal list. Hope you enjoyed!

P.s. There's an actual "Undateable" website....pretty funny. And make sure you watch the video!!!