This is just going to be a quick post, as I am practically running out the door to go to the gym and just getting off work, but I wanted to thank each and every one of you amazing people who read and or commented on yesterdays blog post.
I sat and read your comments with a box of tissue in tow, because the more I read the more I cried. I was so overwhelmed by the amount of support and kind words you all wrote, and you can't imagine how much your words meant to me!!
I thought about you all today and it brought a smile to my face, you touched my heart beyond what I can explain!
I was so nervous to write that post, mainly because that meant I was being vulnerable, I'm always afraid of putting myself out there and getting shot down, for lack of better words. Which is why I think I'm always trying to be so funny and light hearted, all SMILE SMILE SMILE, because If I'm funny I don't have to be vulnerable. But you guys....wow. THANK YOU!!!!! Thank you for embracing me in my vulnerability and uplifting me!
I appreciate you all SOOOOOOO MUCH!!!! And big hugs! Even though I wish i could do it in person!!!
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Being a single mom
I'm double posting today....if you want to see my original post-it note tuesday post click here.
Two things happened this week that I feel have given me strength or insight or I don't know, a different point of view on my situation. I went to church for the first time in years and I read this blog post, by a girl who continually inspires me, and makes me smile. But before I get to either here's a little back ground info.
I met my son's father in October of 2005, I was a waitress living with my father, working for no reason other than making payments on a car that soon after got repoed, and to pay a very small amount of rent... I partied, and lived life like things would never be different. February of 2006 I was pregnant. Life took a very serious turn. Our very new and very not stable relationship turned into something that neither one of us was ready for. I had dreams that he and I would raise our child together and there would be nothing that would tear us apart. BEACAUSE of our son. I was foolish. And in denial. Now, don't misunderstand me. My son was NOT the reason he and I didn't work. We were not meant to be. I ignored the warning signs in the beginning of our relationship, warning signs that should have sent me running, but I didn't. Now maybe this was a case of devine intervention...god wanted me to be there, maybe I was meant to go through that so I could be the person I am today.
I am now 26, and the mother of a wonderful little boy who has taught me so much, who has changed my life, and my reasons for doing things. The mother of a little boy, who wakes up every morning I am with him, and whether I'm really awake or not, says "Good morning mommy, I missed you" Now if that aint a blessing then I don't know what is. My son. Is a BLESSING! But I do struggle sometimes with being a single mother. I see families with their kids, mom and dad happily married. Maybe theyre well off, maybe they struggle, but the one thing they have is a support system in the form of eachother. I struggle with the fact that I am on my own...its just me and myself, making sure MY little family stays together. The world is on my shoulders. Sometimes I feel SO alone. Even if I know I'm not, it's hard sometimes being the kid who can't go outside and play when they're watching all of their friends doing it. I won't lie when I FEEL the stigma attatched to single mothers... it's in people's reactions when I'm asked a question like "Do you and your husband both work" and my answer is "I was never married, and no, his father and I are not together" I see the judgement in some peoples eyes, but I cannot change the fact that I like so many, am a single mother. This is my life, my son is my reason for living, and I WOULD NOT be the person I am today with out him. That does not, however, mean that it isn't tough, or that I don't get down on myself. I rent a room, I do not have a college degree, and I am un-married. All things that I will struggle through changing. I WILL go to school. I WILL have a cute little place for my boy and I one day. And who knows, maybe one day I WILL be married.
Now on to the 2 things that happened this week.... I have been feeling the need for something in my life...My boyfriend was the main encouraging factor to me going to church. He wanted me to be more in touch with my self and god. And the more we talked about it the more I felt like god was tugging at my heart strings... "Sarah, go to church, reconnect with me, PLEASE." Last sunday I went, trevor went to his little sunday school class, and it was just me and the man upstairs. I had no friends with me, or people that I knew there. Just my long lost friend God. I can't tell you how it felt. I felt comfortable, safe and I felt rejuvenated. The pastor was reading through Acts 6, where the Grecian jews were complaining to the Hebraic jews that their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food, back in these days if you were a widow with no sons to help support you, you were destitute. You had no one. The pastor went on to say that there were grecian men appointed to fix the problem. To make sure that these women were not alone. He then said, " By saying the word "widow", I do not only mean, "your husband died". I am speaking to the single mothers out there. You are NOT alone."
These were the words I needed to hear. I thanked him after the service, and he in turn thanked ME.
On to the second thing...I've told you guys about this girl before...Kandee Johnson. Her blog posts are always SO uplifting, her words put a smile on my face, and sometimes bring a tear to my eye. Her post today about being a single mother, was another thing I needed. I am going to quote her here and you'll see why:
Ladies, if one or any of you are a sinlge mama, you are NOT alone....I want you to know that I am HERE. We can help eachother. I will be there to encourage you, and tell you over and over if need be, that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. That you can reach your dreams, that you can acheive your goals.... I (along with god if you want) will be your kandeeJohnsonPeter-John!! Here's my hand...I'm reaching out if you need me!!!
Sometimes all you need is a little inspiration!!!!
Two things happened this week that I feel have given me strength or insight or I don't know, a different point of view on my situation. I went to church for the first time in years and I read this blog post, by a girl who continually inspires me, and makes me smile. But before I get to either here's a little back ground info.
I met my son's father in October of 2005, I was a waitress living with my father, working for no reason other than making payments on a car that soon after got repoed, and to pay a very small amount of rent... I partied, and lived life like things would never be different. February of 2006 I was pregnant. Life took a very serious turn. Our very new and very not stable relationship turned into something that neither one of us was ready for. I had dreams that he and I would raise our child together and there would be nothing that would tear us apart. BEACAUSE of our son. I was foolish. And in denial. Now, don't misunderstand me. My son was NOT the reason he and I didn't work. We were not meant to be. I ignored the warning signs in the beginning of our relationship, warning signs that should have sent me running, but I didn't. Now maybe this was a case of devine intervention...god wanted me to be there, maybe I was meant to go through that so I could be the person I am today.
I am now 26, and the mother of a wonderful little boy who has taught me so much, who has changed my life, and my reasons for doing things. The mother of a little boy, who wakes up every morning I am with him, and whether I'm really awake or not, says "Good morning mommy, I missed you" Now if that aint a blessing then I don't know what is. My son. Is a BLESSING! But I do struggle sometimes with being a single mother. I see families with their kids, mom and dad happily married. Maybe theyre well off, maybe they struggle, but the one thing they have is a support system in the form of eachother. I struggle with the fact that I am on my own...its just me and myself, making sure MY little family stays together. The world is on my shoulders. Sometimes I feel SO alone. Even if I know I'm not, it's hard sometimes being the kid who can't go outside and play when they're watching all of their friends doing it. I won't lie when I FEEL the stigma attatched to single mothers... it's in people's reactions when I'm asked a question like "Do you and your husband both work" and my answer is "I was never married, and no, his father and I are not together" I see the judgement in some peoples eyes, but I cannot change the fact that I like so many, am a single mother. This is my life, my son is my reason for living, and I WOULD NOT be the person I am today with out him. That does not, however, mean that it isn't tough, or that I don't get down on myself. I rent a room, I do not have a college degree, and I am un-married. All things that I will struggle through changing. I WILL go to school. I WILL have a cute little place for my boy and I one day. And who knows, maybe one day I WILL be married.
Now on to the 2 things that happened this week.... I have been feeling the need for something in my life...My boyfriend was the main encouraging factor to me going to church. He wanted me to be more in touch with my self and god. And the more we talked about it the more I felt like god was tugging at my heart strings... "Sarah, go to church, reconnect with me, PLEASE." Last sunday I went, trevor went to his little sunday school class, and it was just me and the man upstairs. I had no friends with me, or people that I knew there. Just my long lost friend God. I can't tell you how it felt. I felt comfortable, safe and I felt rejuvenated. The pastor was reading through Acts 6, where the Grecian jews were complaining to the Hebraic jews that their widows were being overlooked in the daily distribution of food, back in these days if you were a widow with no sons to help support you, you were destitute. You had no one. The pastor went on to say that there were grecian men appointed to fix the problem. To make sure that these women were not alone. He then said, " By saying the word "widow", I do not only mean, "your husband died". I am speaking to the single mothers out there. You are NOT alone."
These were the words I needed to hear. I thanked him after the service, and he in turn thanked ME.
On to the second thing...I've told you guys about this girl before...Kandee Johnson. Her blog posts are always SO uplifting, her words put a smile on my face, and sometimes bring a tear to my eye. Her post today about being a single mother, was another thing I needed. I am going to quote her here and you'll see why:
"Just when I thought that my dreams were slipping away from me even more, little did I know, that all the steps that I thought were going backwards.....God was actually pulling me back, just like a "catapult" or slingshot....(they have to go backwards....but then they launch whatever they're holding...so far ahead of anything else!)....to put me in a place that even I didn't know I could dream of.Maybe *I* could do the same.... never stop working towards my goals, maybe *I* could be the strong one and encourage fellow single mama's that they are NOT alone, and they CAN and will reach their goals. Hers and pastor Peter-john's words touched me. And things are going to start happening for me. Maybe not right away, but they will. I just have to keep trying, keep inspiring myself, keep smiling.... keep LIVING.
I could touch people's hearts, encourage their dreams, and give hope to precious hearts that feel like all hope is gone. I can be a friend, someone, maybe one voice that can keep your dreams alive.
If you are a mama, and feel like you can't accomplish your goals....first, being a mom is the most amazing, honorable thing you'll ever do. It doesn't matter what people say about you or tell you, I've heard some of the most ridiculous things that people have said to me or about me...but the one thing is, God knows the truth, he knows what he has waiting for each one of us!"
Ladies, if one or any of you are a sinlge mama, you are NOT alone....I want you to know that I am HERE. We can help eachother. I will be there to encourage you, and tell you over and over if need be, that YOU ARE NOT ALONE. That you can reach your dreams, that you can acheive your goals.... I (along with god if you want) will be your kandeeJohnsonPeter-John!! Here's my hand...I'm reaching out if you need me!!!
Sometimes all you need is a little inspiration!!!!
Post-it Note Tuesday!
Its time for another installment of Supah Mommy's Post it note tuesday! AND she really is Supah dee dupah....no really. Check her out, You won't be sorry!
And in closing, my favorite "very wise man" said something that I want to share with y'all ....
"Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it."
Mark Twain
I am going to do this today....today WILL be a BEAUTIFUL day! Today I will SMILE! Today I will LAUGH! Today I will drag my thoughts away from my troubles!!!
have a WONDERFUL day!!!!!!!
Monday, April 12, 2010
My favorite things Monday
Guess what today is!!! It's Monday, and that means its time for My Favorite things! I spent alot of time thinking about what the theme for today was going to be, and when I woke up this morning pining for scrambled eggs and turkey bacon, I decided I should post about FOOD. Food and I are likethis. As the eldest daughter of a very talented cook, I was exposed to a very wide variety of flavors from a young age...there is really not much I won't eat, and alot of my tastes aren't fancy, just good old food! So here they are, in no particular order:
In n Out Double double Animal Style
Double double= dbl cheeeeze dbl meat
Animal Style= grilled onions, extra special sauce, lettuce, tomatoes,
grilled onions and extra pickles.
I have a foodgasm just looking at this, I CRAVE this like you
don't even know.... In n out, which Im sure some of you may
have heard of is a family owned fast food restuarant, and they have
an extremely small menu, everything is DELICIOUS. And they
cut their french fries in the restuarant...no nasty frozen crap.
A double double animal style is my own personal little
slice of heaven!
Dana Bagel
This crunchy little love is on the menu where I work...
in this case its on an everything bagel, toasted twice and scooped out.
Cream cheese, avocado and Lemon pepper. But it's a special KIND
of lemon pepper, I could tell you but of course I'd have to kill
you afterwards. The Lemon pepper MAKES this bagel. And
it's OHHHHH SOOOOO DELICIOUS!!!!
Grandma's Meatloaf
This picture is NOT my grandma's meat loaf....
but since I don't have a picture it will just have to do.
I have been eating and LOVING my grandmother's meatloaf
my whole life. She just stopped asking me what I wanted to
eat when I'd go to visit her, because she knew what the answer
was going to be. Even to this day, she has a loaf ready when I
visit. On holidays, it's turkey, ham, taters and a meatloaf.
I'm drooling. You remember the quote from 'A christmas
Story'? "Meatloaf smeatloaf, double beatloaf, I HATE meatloaf!"
Shooooot, I would snatched up that kids plate and eaten it all up!
Potatoes
I love Potatoes every which way possible...and in ANYTHING
possible... hashed, mashed, roasted, fried, salted, sliced, diced,
in soup, on a plate...ANYWHERE. Smothered in ketchup in most cases.
Mashed with gravy and mixed with peas and corn might be my all time fave.
Shrimp
"Anyways, like I was sayin', Shrimp is the fruit of the sea.
you can barbque it, broil it, boil it, bake it, sautee it. Dey's uh
shrimp kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried,
stir fried. There's pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper
shrimp. Shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes,
shrimp burger, shrimp sandwhich...that-that's about it."
-Bubba
Breakfast
I love breakfast foods...this picture is to me the perfect breakfast.
I would only make slight variations with the eggs. But we'll be talking about
eggs in a minute. Bacon, sausage, and toast to sopp up the yolks...throw in
some hashbrowns and I'm on it like swimwear. As for the eggs, scrambled,
over easy, or poached I love them...and all of these foods combined
create one big food, because if I were eating this the whole plate
would be mixed together and smothered in ketchup, as i mentioned
before. And biquits with gravy are welcomed with this dish as well!
Golden Spoon Frozen yogurt
On a hot summer day, there is NOTHING better
than a chocolate malt and cake batter with yogurt chips, or
chopped almonds, oooh or maybe chocolate sprinkles.
It doesn't even have to be summer, I'll sit there and shiver
through my fro yo I love it so much.
'Wahoo's' Grilled Chicken tacos
Wahoo's is known for their delicious fish tacos, only in
california can you get their awesome food. Wahoo's is fresh, and healthy
and their menu options are great. But my drool fest comes from the
grilled chicken tacos, with black beans and rice. Lime squeezed on them
is a must oh and they have to be covered in fresh salsa.
MMMMMM.....
Subway Turkey sandwhich
I can get down on turkey sandwhiches from subway like you wouldn't
believe. These for me are a great go to when all want is an In n Out Double
double, and I don't want to destroy my work out... oh so refreshing and crunchy
and very satisfying. Or in other words I might be a little obsessed!
Disneyland Churros
If you've never had the pleasure I am so very sorry.
Disney land food is AWESOME. And part of going to d land is
feeding your face. They have the best churros ever, there's a churro cart
practically every three feet. Crunchy on the outside, and soft and doughy on
the insde AND packed with cinnamon and sugar. To die for. AND you can
get caramel sauce for dipping!
Now I have to tell you, there are MANY many other foods I love. MANY. But for this list I had to chose the ultimates. I can't wait to see what yours are! So link up, and grab some paper towels because you'll need them to wipe the drool from your chin!
Don't forget to grab the button from the right side of my blog and post it somewhere in you "My favorite things" post, anf if you need to click it and it will direct you to the instructions page!
Have a GREAT day all!!
Friday, April 9, 2010
Friday Fragments
It's that time of the week again, same bat time, same bat channel....remember old school Bat Man? The ridiculously campy, afternoon Bat Man, with Adam West...I LOVED THAT SHOW!
I seriously digress....Its the time of the week where I spew my most random thoughts, along with Ms.4444 over at Half Past Kisssin' Time, the home of Friday Fragments...Link up!
****Can we say crazy earth quake on EasterSunday?! The biggest in Mexico or California since 1992 when we had a 7.3.. Sunday's was a 7.2...and for someone who's lived in Cali my whole life, earthquakes are somewhat of a normal thing... an earthquake hits and well all just stand there and wait for it to end...but I won't lie, this one was a wee smidgen tricky... and lasted almost a whole minute...insead of standing there waiting for it to stop in 20 seconds, I was gripping the counter asking myself if it was GOING to end and it was Trev's 1st big one...now my boy is a true Californian!
****The Lilies STILL smell ridonkulous, I walk in the door and can't help but inhale...I could so just wear one around all day!
****My grandmother has a huge Tangerine tree in her back yard, and spring has sprung, the weather is warming up...the reason why this is signifigant is, citrus trees don't do so hot fruit wise during the spring and summer, but during the winter they they fill to the brim. This particular tree gives the most delicious, sweet, juicy Tangerines you could possibly even dream of. I have memories of Thanksgiving and Christmas, going out to the old Tangerine tree and just standing out there for an hour feeding my face. You DO NOT EVEN KNOW. I learned how to pick the best and seedless ones, and that sometimes the BEST best ones are the ones that fell off the tree and ripened in the Escondio sun for a day. I am eating one of the last few good tangerines of the year.... but boy oh boy, are they worth the wait!
That's right. INSIDE the tree!
****Work was insanely busy this week...its spring break, unseasonably warm for the time of year, and absolutely gorgeous. A killer combination for the Dana Point Harbor... The kind of comination that gives you a one-two punch and leaves your knocked on your ass with business. Which, is a GOOD thing, it's just exhausting. AND it's tourist time. The harbor is a trap, one big, beautiful tourist trap. Sometimes I like and sometimes I don't...depends on the day and the tourist. The upside is that I meet people from all over the world, and it's pretty awesome on a good day! As for it being busy, it's only going to keep getting busier, so I'm sure you'll be hearing about it!
****I haven't blogged since Tuesday, I feel like such a slacker...wed-fri are crazy busy for me and are the days my honey and I spend with eachother, my real work week Friday is tomorrow....and then I get to bask in the greatness of days off, time to actually read blogs with out days to catch up on, gym time... where I make the stair climber say my name, time to maybe write a post or 2 or 5 (not really but I might try) and with out a doubt do morning cartoons, cuddles, turkey bacon and eggs, and Spongebob with my boy. Seriously the best.
I really hope every one of you had a SUPER week, I was happy ALL week and I really hope you all were too!!!
Don't forget to SMILE. I don't know about you, but it helps me!!!
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Monday, April 5, 2010
My favorite things Mondays
I've done a couple posts so far on My favorite things...where I list 10 of my favorite things in a certain catagory of fun shenanigans, I kept telling myself I was going to do it every week and just haven't. I decided tonight that I am going to start my very own little day, where all of you wonderful people can link up and do it with me every week!
And hence, My favorite things Monday has been born!
The rules are simple:
Every monday morning I will pick a category....It could be anything from Music to Make up....Cleaning products to Creatures.
You list 10 of your favorite things in that category.
Smile...a big cheesy one that is.. because you get to talk about the things you love the most.
And lastly Link up, Grab the button and put it somewhere in your post, it will link back to this page.
And hence, My favorite things Monday has been born!
The rules are simple:
Every monday morning I will pick a category....It could be anything from Music to Make up....Cleaning products to Creatures.
You list 10 of your favorite things in that category.
Smile...a big cheesy one that is.. because you get to talk about the things you love the most.
And lastly Link up, Grab the button and put it somewhere in your post, it will link back to this page.
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